SCREAM AWAY
With apologies to Richard A. Whiting and Sidney Clare
I’ve thrown away my toys, even my bum and brain
I want to make big bucks, without much mental strain
Some day I’m going to write, maybe draw some cartoons too
When I hit it big, I would dig for you to be my crew!
MUDDY MONDAY
Of dogs, spiders, squid, and avocado toast
The first few minutes found Holly J See stuck watching Baskerville Old Face make an onion, mushroom, and kale 3-cheese omelet with anchovies. Soon Cap’n Susan Brearley showed up telling us how the best place to get avocado toast is at Dunkin Donuts. Apparently Panera’s doesn’t have it going on…
ALL THE LETTERS
Deliveress from guilt
After breakfast, crushed deeply, even further, growing helplessly into justifications, knowing life may not offer promises quite right so that understanding voices will xerically yammer zombifications.
About that title — I know you were wondering!
The White Goddess, a book-length essay concerning the nature of poetic myth, used to be…
PRO TIPS FROM OLD FACE
The easy way
Forgive me for the digression, but the need for this PSA grows by the day:Help us do the job for which we Mudditors are not paid but perform entirely out of love for you, our writers.Please do not dismiss or delete the private notes. Thank you. Now on…
PRO TIPS FROM OLD FACE
Don’t miss out!
Forgive me for the digression, but the need for this PSA grows by the day:Help us do the job for which we Mudditors are not paid but perform entirely out of love for you, our writers.Please do not dismiss or delete the private notes.Thank you. Now on…
PRO TIPS FROM OLD FACE
Keep the change
Forgive me for the digression, but the need for this PSA grows by the day:Help us do the job for which we Mudditors are not paid but perform entirely out of love for you, our writers.Please do not dismiss or delete the private notes.Thank you. Now on…
LEVEL UP, SUCKERS!
#3 will floor you
Wondering why I didn’t call this “Five Ways to Take Your Life to the Next Level?” For one thing, there is no way that title hasn’t already found its way to the top of some Medium article or another.
For another, “Five Ways to Next Level Your Life” is shorter…
YOU CAN’T WIN
Maybe I should start arguing with the science
How does this even happen after more than a week in quarantine? Ten days to be exact? Am I an asymptomatic long-hauler? What would that even be? Shall I start taking Hydroxychloroquine? Ivermectin? Laetrile? CBD? CDB? CDC? PDQ?
Let’s try this again
Dear Vaccine Refuseniks,
I direct this letter exclusively to you who won’t get vaccinated, not at you who can’t¹.
I run across you from time to time even here on Medium, that bastion of reason and good sense. I’ve tried to be reasonable and point out the indisputable facts, but…
Of rapid tests and PCRs, of choirs and bands, of theater, driving, and RSV
Imagine my shock at receiving a positive PCR test result. A real sucker punch, given the negative result of my rapid antigen test on the same day I took the PCR test. As an added bonus, it struck me full up-side the head with the iron fist of irony. The…
