"I might have been stoned the day I tried my first shrimp po’boy."
That could do it. I was baked the first time I was in Taco Bell. I thought I had died and that was what was on the menu, God having become too cheap to serve 72 virgins to my 23 year old self.
My 72nd birthday is coming up. If I die on my birthday will God provide 23 virgins? Will I even care?